The Three Musketeers: chapter 6

Drinking: Mountain Dew

Listening: Coldplay

Don't judge me, I'm posting from my Chinese lunch spot.

We left D'Artagnan and the boys riding rather high, fresh off their victory over the Cardinal's guards.   It seems that their victory is causing quite a stir, Mr T. has been summoned to the kings presence.  It turns out that, rather than put foot to ass on his officers like a real commander would do when his troops lost, the Cardinal has been whining to the king about how the musketeers ambushed his troops.  What a wuss.

Actual photo of Cardinal Richelieu

Mr T. tells the king how it really went down (with a few itsy bitsy embellishments), and the king is quite pleased.  It seems that he and the Cardinal are having a bit of a proxy war with their respective forces, a victory for the musketeers is a victory for the king, but only if they don't start it.  The king asks to see the musketeers the next day.

Our boys rise early the next day, but their appointment isn't until noon, so they stop off for a quick game of tennis before seeing the king.  Badass swordsmen like tennis.  It is known.

Everyone loves tennis

During their tennis game, one of the Cardinal's guards shows up, and makes fun of D's tennis abilities.  We're only 6 chapters in and we know what that means: a fight to the death.  D' and Mr. Guardsman step outside for some quick swordplay, and D' totally stabs the guy in the lung.  Unfortunately he does so right outside one of the prime hangouts of the Cardinal's Guards.  Soon, he's outnumbered 3 to 1.  Not to worry though, Athos, Porthos, and Aramis have come outside and the ass-kicking commences.  Soon both sides are calling out their reinforcements and it's a general brawl.  The Guards retreat inside their hideout, and some Musketeers decide it might be a good idea to burn the place down.  I guess I underestimated the rivalry up to this point.  That's some cold-blooded shit.  D' and the boys talk them out of it, and rush off to report to Mr. T.   He's pretty pissed.  In a proxy war, small out of the way duels are acceptable.  Riots and trying to burn down buildings all over Paris, not so much.

They rush off to see the king, but he's out hunting.  Since they won't be the first person to tell him about the battle, they need a witness.  Mr. T calls on the guy with the stabbed lung, figuring since he's on death's doorstep he won't lie lest he damn himself to eternal hellfire.  He brings one of the higher-ups of the Cardinal's Guards along too.   The guy spills it, about how he started it, and the next day they report it to the king.  The king is pretty damn happy.  Not only is the score King - 2, Cardinal - 0, but it's all the Cardinal's fault.  He meets the D' and the Musketeers, and actually rewards them for their valiant service.  D' is now even closer to Musketeerhood.  The king puts him in another guard company that works closely with the Musketeers, and D' only has to serve 2 years for a promotion, or, if he can find a way to distinguish himself . 

D'Artagnan may be a murderous little douchebag, but I'm starting to like the kid.